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 My poems :3

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Sakura
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Join date : 2010-01-27
Location : The Sky

PostSubject: My poems :3   Thu Feb 11, 2010 5:13 pm

I was thinking about submitting them for a contest, but I wasn't sure. If you guys like it then I'll ask my English teacher Mr. K if I should, because when we submit things teachers have to submit them for us.

Tell me which one you like best!
--
Music
Every note stands out from the others
Every sound hides a message
Each sharp or flat can change the entire piece.
The rhythms are running in your mind
Painting pictures
Like a daydream.
Music is art too.
It’s also an inspiration, Varying for different people.
Music is what keeps you Going.
You feel on top of the world
Nothing can stop you now
As you imagine yourself
Slowly, gracefully,
Falling from the sky.
With the melodies
Elegant, charming, kind.
And with the hidden Harmonies
That you deliberately find.
Music
Is
A way to get away from
The stress filled hardship That we call life.

--
Perspective

In a garden filled with daisies
Stands a single rose
Others thought it was silly, that it ruined
the garden

This garden shouldn’t have any roses, you
know

That’s what they told to me.
Why shouldn’t there be?

They looked at it like it was nothing.
They looked at it just the way it was.
A light pink rose.
It wasn’t just a flower.
It was a symbol,

It had a message
That the others clearly couldn’t see.
The petals.
A gentle component that recalls the old
memories.

Some are dead, colorless,
The dull, antagonistic, and maybe tragic
parts of life

The bright, radiant petals
Filled with harmony, elegance, joy
The thorns.
Pulling at thoughts
That I
said I would never bring up again

Pulling at the painful things in the past

The stem.
Always growing, always looking forward.
Even if it’s uncertain. You never know if you
try.

They don’t see it the way I do.
A rose is only a rose, I suppose.
For those
Who are afraid to look for a deeper meaning
In
each and every individual, unique, one

--
Simplicity

10 letters.
Simple and sweet.
We don’t need
The resplendent,
ostentatious, fanciful Things we have today.
We don’t need
Elegance in every step
we take.
We don’t need
Countless arguments and fights.
We don’t need
All the violence.
We don’t need
To be perfect.
Yet
We need complexity
Or how would being
simple be?

--
Vote and rate!
Comment on your fave!
And why!
Thanks!
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McKenna
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PostSubject: Re: My poems :3   Thu Feb 11, 2010 5:16 pm

I like the Music best just cuz! Cool! 10/10 for all!
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pinkys
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PostSubject: Re: My poems :3   Thu Feb 11, 2010 5:18 pm

those are amazing!! i like simplicity the best!
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Sakura
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PostSubject: Re: My poems :3   Thu Feb 11, 2010 5:37 pm

Thanks guys Very Happy
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Sharpsul999
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PostSubject: Re: My poems :3   Thu Feb 11, 2010 5:42 pm

Hm there OK, but cool!
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Karla
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Age : 18

PostSubject: Re: My poems :3   Thu Feb 11, 2010 7:34 pm

cool
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Sharpsul999
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PostSubject: Re: My poems :3   Thu Feb 11, 2010 7:45 pm

Hey Karla, can you not one word post, thank you.
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Sakura
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PostSubject: Re: My poems :3   Thu Feb 11, 2010 9:25 pm

Looks like Music is the favorite here Razz
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heartsNARIA
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Location : You dun need to kno... STALKERS! :P

PostSubject: Re: My poems :3   Thu Feb 11, 2010 9:28 pm

those rock! I like music best though.
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Ghost
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PostSubject: Re: My poems :3   Thu Feb 11, 2010 9:37 pm

Karla wrote:
cool
Please do not 1-word posts.
Sharpsul99 wrote:
Hey Karla, can you not one word post, thank you.
I'm tired of explaining this, but you have no authority outside of the Party Section.
You are not a Global Moderator.
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GilaWolf13
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PostSubject: Re: My poems :3   Thu Feb 11, 2010 9:46 pm

Nice poems Sakura!
I like them all. (:
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Sakura
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PostSubject: Re: My poems :3   Thu Feb 11, 2010 9:51 pm

@ Hearts! Thanks! It seems to be the favoriteee of all xD
@Gila! Thanks as well Very Happy Glad to recieve feedback (:
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Sharpsul999
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PostSubject: Re: My poems :3   Fri Feb 12, 2010 3:24 pm

Ghost, really, stop. I'm trying to not let people gain posts by one word posting, k? I know I'm not a global mod, but at least I'm doing the RIGHT THING.
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kiki424
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PostSubject: Re: My poems :3   Fri Feb 12, 2010 3:52 pm

awesome poems!!! idk which one is the best r u gonna b a writer when ur older?
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nancydrew12
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PostSubject: Re: My poems :3   Fri Feb 12, 2010 5:41 pm

KEWL!!! I like the music and simplicity one! <33 luv it!
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Sakura
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PostSubject: Re: My poems :3   Fri Feb 12, 2010 5:50 pm

@Kiki- Maybe, we'll see, I always wanted to be one :3
@Nancy- Thanks! Me too Very Happy

Ok, so today I went up to my English teacher and I was like, "Mr. K. I wanted to submit something to the contest. and he was like "Ok, cool. Do you have an example? and i said yea, so he said "put it on my desk, I'll read it later. And if we have time in class we can talk about it."

But we didn't have time in class
so I went to him before we had Performing arts and I was like 5 minutes late to orchestra. But I don't mind :3
He told me that Music and Simplicity were the best, but the endings could be stronger, and that Perspective was good and he LOVED certain moments of it but it just didn't appeal to him as much as the others. He said that Simplicity was sweet and he loved the message.
And he was like, "Darn, There's not much time to revise. Deadline's on Sunday." and I'm like, "Yea, sorry about that. I was waiting for you to grade our Weekly 300s (we write 300 words about anything each week but we stopped a while ago)" and he was like, "Yea. Everything's so chaotic I haven't had time to grade it. Good luck Grace." and I'm like, "So you really like them?" and he said, "Fer sure" and then I left xD
So I edited the endings a little
and sended 'em in!

Too bad we don't get the results until May
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PostSubject: Re: My poems :3   Today at 11:20 am

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My poems :3
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