on sexuality (straight, bi, gay, please read!)

THIS IS A LONG POST I KNOW BUT IF YOU ARE QUESTIONING YOUR SEXUALITY OR SIMPLY WANT TO KNOW MORE ABOUT THE SUBJECT IT IS WORTH THE READ!!!

hey-o!! ok so i've seen a lot of threads in the past day or two about sexuality and crushes and relationships and i thought i'd address that real quick with my own thoughts on it.

first off, the most important thing is: you are not defined by your sexuality. all it says is who you are attracted to in terms of a relationship! and another thing, is that it is nobody's business. if you don't want people to know, don't tell them. if you do, do tell them. it's entirely your choice.

now i'd like to explain something, and that's sexual vs romantic attraction. MOST PEOPLE THINK THAT if you are, for example, heterosexual, that means you can only be in relationships with people of the opposite sex. this is wrong!! if you are heterosexual you are sexually attracted to people of the opposite sex. but you could, for example, also be homoromantic, in other words you are ROMANTICALLY attracted to people of the same sex. for most people they will be the same thing but for others, not so much. for example! i am heterosexual and biromantic, which means i am sexually attracted, as a female, to males, but i am romantically attracted to both males and females.

now, to explain the kinds of sexualities and ... romanticalities, we'll say.

heterosexuality and heteroromanticity -- you are sexually or romantically attracted to people of the opposite sex.
bisexuality and biromanticity -- you are sexually or romantically attracted to people of both sexes, OR of two genders.
homosexuality and homoromanticity -- you are sexually or romantically attracted to people of the same sex.
asexuality and aromanticity -- you are not sexually or romantically attracted to anyone.
demisexuality and demiromanticity -- you are only sexually attracted to people you have been in a relationship with for a long time, and you are only romantically attracted to people you have known for a long time.

there's also pansexual/panromantic and polysexual/polyromantic but those have to do with GENDER instead of SEX which is a very, VERY complex topic i won't get into. (please look down for oliver's super useful explanation on it!!)

a very important thing to remember is if you identify as, say, a heterosexual, and you are female, but one day find a female attractive, it DOES NOT NECESSARILY MEAN YOU ARE HOMOSEXUAL. it is possible to simply admire and be attracted to people of the same sex without identifying majorly as homosexual! and that applies to the other way around, and et cetera. (also note that there is such thing as a scale -- you can be predominantly heterosexual meaning you mostly are attracted to the opposite sex, but slightly homosexual in that you are sometimes attracted to the same sex. other way around applies.)

another very important thing: just because a lot of people are bisexual/biromantic or homosexual/homoromantic DOESN'T MEAN YOU HAVE TO BE TOO. it's not cool or different. it's just a part of your identity. it doesn't make you unique and special, and thinking it does is actually extremely offensive because it's like putting those people into a different category!! just figure out who you're really attracted to. it is also possible to show support for the community (lgbt) while not being one yourself, simply by being kind and nice to those of differing sexuality identities, and not discriminating!

i will also answer ANY questions you have about these things!! sexuality is an important part of a person's identity and it should never be repressed or kept in the dark, and questions should be very much encouraged.

Thank The Lord 4 this

I don't even know what I am, most likely pansexual or demisexual. I have a crush on a few people of whom I won't name, though some already know.

perfect!! thank you for this!

This is a is really helpful post to those who don't know this stuff.
I actually learned a few things, thanks for sharing with us!

Thank you so, so much for this! I often see a lot of people get confused with the difference between sexual attractions and romantic attractions and such so I think this is a really helpful post. c':

ahh you're welcome everyone!! i'm so glad it's helped some of you. i just think sexuality/romanticity is such a central point in your identity and so many people, especially teenagers, are misinformed about it, and it can make things difficult.

Lets say I am heterosexuality and heteroromanticity.

hello!!! i will add on a little by explaining the scary genders and pansexuality ooh O.o
--
basically, everyone has a gender and a sex. for most people these are typically the same, but for others they're different, don't match up. a girl that's male, a boy that's female, etc.
THESE PEOPLE ARE NOT ANY LESS BOYS/GIRLS!!! this might seem a bit confusing, but let me explain, i'll talk a few gender identities.
-
transgender
a person that was born the wrong sex. a transgender woman (or a transwoman) is a girl thats male, and a transgender man (or a transman) a boy that's female. this is basically positive to be biological, something to do with the brain signals. basically, it's something they cannot control, and their brain is boy/girl, while their chromosomes says something else. transwoman are woman, transmen are men, treat them as such, end of story. dont infest them with questions, don't expect them to be super interesting, etc.
BY THE WAY BEING TRANS DOESNT MEAN "wanting to be the other gender, feeling like other gender" ITS BEING THIS GENDER, WITH THAT SEX. nothing else.

TRANS PEOPLE WITH SEXUALITY: pansexual DOES NOT mean you would date a transperson. to date someone trans still only falls in gay/lesbian/bisexual as youre dating either a boy, or a girl, nothing else. some people won't date trans people, which i think is completely idiotic, but whatever.

bigender
person that switches from two genders, typically boy and girl, but can be others. this is also something biological. sometimes they feel like one gender, other times others. respect these people and use the pronouns (they, he, she, etc) they want to use at the time. they are bigender and are these two genders, sometimes at different times, something at the same time.

BIGENDER PEOPLE WITH SEXUALITY: gay and straight people are basically kicked out by now, but when it comes to bisexual people, they can still date a bigender person, if it's the two genders the bisexual person likes.

agender
you basically have no gender. also biological. this person does not feel like any gender at any time, and the person should treat them as such, using the pronouns they like. they are not confused, they are simply none.

AGENDER PEOPLE WITH SEXUALITY: bi people are also kicked out by now unless one of the two genders they like is agender. pansexuality now enters, but i'll explain what that is later.

trigender
identifies as a third gender, depends on the person which. use the pronouns they want and don't ask them too many questions.

TRIGENDER PEOPLE WITH SEXUALITY: same as agender.

cisgender
what most people are. gender matches up with sex.
CISGENDER PEOPLE WITH SEXUALITY: you should know this. come on.

theres also genderqueer but that ones a little hard to explain, and there are others, too.
SOMEONES GENDER CAN CHANGE OVER TIME!! even if right now its a little hard to understand the concept of gender as you always saw it hand in hand with sex, really, they're completely different things! try to first understand transgender and go from there. even if you don't understand it, please be respectful! dont call a transwoman a man or a transman a woman because THATS NOT WHAT THEY ARE!!!
--
anyway pansexual is someone that would date ANY gender. as you now see.
:v) cheers!!!

oh GOSH!!! thank you so much oliver for the super great gender explanation!!

also, to add, polysexuality is when you will date multiple genders but not all of them, like pansexuality.

This is so helpful,thanks Olli and Jaspers!

I'm sort of bigender. I used to kind of want to be a girl (not giving any reasons), but lately I've been identifying as male.

I'm not really sure about my sexuality, since I haven't really had any serious crushes yet. I mean, not that I've never fanboyed over fictional characters, but I haven't really liked anyone real for more than a day or two. I'm guessing bi or gay, but I might be something else.

just so you guys know, being bigender or any other gender isn't about wanting to be that gender, its more about knowing that was who you were meant to be and it causes you immense pain that you have the wrong body, whether its always or just sometimes.
:v)

Im Asexual. This is extremely helpful :]

Spoiler:

This guide really helps, thank you!

This is really helpful!

I've read all of this, and decided that I'm 100% straight after thinking and thinking about it for a while.

Thank you, again!

Am I the only straight here?