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 The Unravelers-Prologue

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A t e l i e r
Regular Fantagian
A t e l i e r


Posts : 126
Join date : 2011-04-26
Age : 23
Location : Computer chair. Or Apple store. They're the same thing.

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PostSubject: The Unravelers-Prologue   The Unravelers-Prologue Icon_minitimeSat Sep 22, 2012 6:03 pm

She stealthily climbed up the stairs, silent as the night, deadly as a warrior, and prepared for a fight. The child’s room was unprotected. Slowing opening the door with almost no sound, she crepted up the the crib, huddled in a poised position, she prepared to attack… what she saw was unexpected.
The child stared at her face, curious newborn eyes scanning her, and she stepped back. She cannot will herself to bring the knife down, so she left. The child’s right ear was missing, she recalled. That was scaring, and disturbing. Whatever happened to her?
It was unlike an professtional assasine like herself to have mercy. She wanted to go back into the room. Kill her, she urged herself. If she left without acheiving what she was there for, her boss would be rather angry, plus he was a nutcase, so she often did not understand what his plans were. Him or her, she did not know. She never met her boss. But still, why murder her? She went back, again closing the door slowing without a sound this time, ran out the door, looked at the house, this house, one last time, then knew, from her insticts, that later on in the future she’ll regr
et it.
.*.`*.`

That child was Relda Kangami.

So this is my story, called 'The Unravelers'. I originally posted this onto my blog, but only five people read it. Critique this, please? Need some suggestions, or click the link in my signature...to read more. I'm getting Writer's block, and currently waiting impatiently for the next ten days until Mark of Athena arrives...
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http://atelierpixel.wordpress.com
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PostSubject: Re: The Unravelers-Prologue   The Unravelers-Prologue Icon_minitimeSat Sep 22, 2012 6:06 pm

Amazing! Great job!

Hey are you Glitters from deviantart? Well anyways welcome to the forum!
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A t e l i e r
Regular Fantagian
A t e l i e r


Posts : 126
Join date : 2011-04-26
Age : 23
Location : Computer chair. Or Apple store. They're the same thing.

The Unravelers-Prologue Empty
PostSubject: Re: The Unravelers-Prologue   The Unravelers-Prologue Icon_minitimeSat Sep 22, 2012 6:10 pm

Eve Moonlit wrote:
Amazing! Great job!

Hey are you Glitters from deviantart? Well anyways welcome to the forum!

O.o I've been on this for a while, actually, even longer than you. Embarassed But I've forgotten about this site for a while...
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Mr.Noah
Expert Fantagian
Mr.Noah


Posts : 2629
Join date : 2012-06-27
Age : 26
Location : New York

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PostSubject: Re: The Unravelers-Prologue   The Unravelers-Prologue Icon_minitimeSun Sep 23, 2012 5:42 pm

Cool ! :]
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