| My Story For English | |
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+6mayanm Katie_Forever Sandy Primrose pokeranger Crownie 10 posters |
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Crownie Dedicated Fantagian
Posts : 1010 Join date : 2011-09-11 Age : 28 Location : In the center of the sun.
| Subject: My Story For English Mon Oct 10, 2011 9:43 pm | |
| In my English class I have to make up a plot and sell the main character. Since we're reading a science fiction novella, he told us to make it science fiction. Here's what I came up with today. (:
Later in the future, the universal law says all humans must have a microchip inside them. By the law, the microchip must be put into all babies at the age of one. The microchip is used to locate people to find criminals, lost children and more. It can also hold basic personal information such as name, date of birth, and identification number. Those who did not follow the law were called Unknowns and were treated as nonexistent; People with the microchip had a mark on their right arm from the painful shot, and people without the microchip did not have it. Mika, a seventeen year old, and her single mother are Unknowns in a small town in Japan. Her grandparents, who were now deceased, saw the new universal law as unnecessary and a violation of privacy. Her father was different though; He was chipped. He found the microchip such an irritant he cut out the chip himself from his arm and died years later from a deadly infection caused by the removal of the chip. She saw the way the infection began to eat up her father’s arm and kill him. Because of this, Mika was afraid of being chipped and also inspired to find a cure for the infection. Mika’s passion is education, but since she was an Unknown it was against the law for her to go to a public school for free. Unknowns had to pay a fee to go to a public school, but they were still very discriminated by teachers and other students. She wants education so she can find a way to remove the microchip and avoid the infection. She wants to help others become detached from the computers and satellites of the world government.
Later she finds two friends at her school who are Existents, people who have the microchip in them; a boy and a girl who are twins. They notice that Mika is very smart and has a lot of potential but lacks the attention from teachers, so they help Mika by sharing their knowledge that the teachers don’t teach Mika.
What do you think? Need to turn it in tomorrow. LOL | |
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pokeranger Hero Fantagian
Posts : 5454 Join date : 2010-01-29 Age : 25 Location : Loading...
| Subject: Re: My Story For English Mon Oct 10, 2011 9:46 pm | |
| I actually like it~ My teacher told me sentences never start with because, but I don't like him. xP | |
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Crownie Dedicated Fantagian
Posts : 1010 Join date : 2011-09-11 Age : 28 Location : In the center of the sun.
| Subject: Re: My Story For English Mon Oct 10, 2011 9:53 pm | |
| Thank you!
&If you're talking about this sentence "Because of this, Mika was afraid of being chipped and also inspired to find a cure for the infection."
'Because of this' can actually be moved to the end of the sentence. "Mika was afraid of being chipped and also inspired to find a cure for the infection because of this." But I put it in the front so it would be easier for the reader to know that "this" refers to the sentence before it. (: | |
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pokeranger Hero Fantagian
Posts : 5454 Join date : 2010-01-29 Age : 25 Location : Loading...
| Subject: Re: My Story For English Mon Oct 10, 2011 9:55 pm | |
| Ah. I do that, my teacher drops one grade level because of it. Ugh, he no smarticles. | |
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Primrose Ultimate Fantagian
Posts : 8311 Join date : 2011-08-27 Age : 21 Location : District 12
| Subject: Re: My Story For English Mon Oct 10, 2011 10:09 pm | |
| I like it. yay! | |
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Sandy Passionate Fantagian
Posts : 868 Join date : 2011-07-09 Age : 23
| Subject: Re: My Story For English Mon Oct 10, 2011 10:10 pm | |
| That's really good, I hope you get a good grade. <3 | |
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Katie_Forever Loyal Fantagian
Posts : 1687 Join date : 2011-06-30 Age : 25 Location : Lala Land :)
| Subject: Re: My Story For English Mon Oct 10, 2011 10:23 pm | |
| Thats great crownie. Hopefully you will get a great mark from it. | |
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Guest Guest
| Subject: Re: My Story For English Tue Oct 11, 2011 12:56 am | |
| I suck at Science Fiction. In writing class, I made a story on an alien dude who had to defeat a villain trying to rule the world. x) I didn't even finish it, LLOOLLOLOL.
Anywayssssss, nice job. Hope it gets finished! ;3 |
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mayanm Expert Fantagian
Posts : 2088 Join date : 2011-05-14 Age : 24 Location : Noitacol. It's a location all right!
| Subject: Re: My Story For English Tue Oct 11, 2011 1:57 am | |
| Wow, that's one rocking story!! I absolutely love it! | |
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Blue Veteran Fantagian
Posts : 3257 Join date : 2011-05-04 Age : 110 Location : How am I supposed to know? D; LOCATING MYSELF IS HARD.
| Subject: Re: My Story For English Tue Oct 11, 2011 2:08 am | |
| It's amazing! :3 Me likey. Good luck! | |
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Relora Hero Fantagian
Posts : 6776 Join date : 2010-11-30 Age : 26 Location : Define "Location"
| Subject: Re: My Story For English Wed Oct 12, 2011 5:32 pm | |
| You better have gotten like a 6 on it (6 is the highest you can get on writing papers where I'm from) | |
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Usui Hero Fantagian
Posts : 5275 Join date : 2011-09-09 Age : 24 Location : Worldbuscus
| Subject: Re: My Story For English Wed Oct 12, 2011 5:41 pm | |
| Nice crownie u deserve a A+ | |
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fantageroxs Senior Fantagian
Posts : 354 Join date : 2011-09-26 Age : 21
| Subject: Re: My Story For English Wed Oct 12, 2011 9:11 pm | |
| woah ur good! can u tell me what science fiction is though? | |
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Crownie Dedicated Fantagian
Posts : 1010 Join date : 2011-09-11 Age : 28 Location : In the center of the sun.
| Subject: Re: My Story For English Wed Oct 12, 2011 9:17 pm | |
| Thanks you guys. (: Science Fiction is a genre. It's like a futuristic theme. Something that COULD happen later in the future. Such as: Robots, flying cars, 2050, life on other planets.
Sorry, I'm bad at explaining xD | |
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