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 ~Blindfold -a Love story~

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Lorena
pokeranger
ashley123
Bluerivers1
Karen
v
Peter
nancydrew12
snake
Jenette
Sakura
CakeBossLover
Trash
McKenna
Candy456
Sharpsul999
kiki424
pinkys
Lyli
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Lyli
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Lyli


Posts : 1149
Join date : 2010-01-30
Location : Peegale 5ever (that mean more than 4eva)

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PostSubject: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeMon Feb 22, 2010 7:24 pm

Beauty26 was a fifteen year old girl.
And an average one.
She was shy when she wanted to; And wasn't anything else...

~Beginning~
The sun was rising at the crack of dawn one summer day.
"Yawwwwwwwwwwwwn..."
I looked at my iHome/alarm clock.
"6:00?!?!?"
I went back to bed; I was NOT going to wake up at that time...
Never!
I rolled on my side, refusing to look at the time.
"I wanna be a rockstar, a sup-" my alarm clock sang.
"A shut-up!"
I hopped out of my bed...
There was no use of trying to fall back asleep.

~At School~
~September 9th~
"Okay class! The project is due on the 21st!...."
"...No exeptions!"
"Whatever.." I moaned, followed by an eye roll.
"Hey..."
I felt something tap me on the shoulder...
I turned around, with my heart racing faster.
"Ahhhh!" I screamed
"Hahahaaa" Ashley said with a paper mustace taped to her face.
"Ash, you scared the crap outta me!"
"Haha, I know.." She said with a devious smile.
Ashley said something.
But my heart and eyes were on something else.
Max.
He was just foolin' around with his buds.
Suddenly, our eyes met.
My heart skipped a beat.
I put my head down.
Oh my god. I bet he thinks I'm a freak! I was staring at him for like 10 minutes!
"What were you staring at?" blue asked
"Oh, nothing..." I lied
"Uh huh, sureeeee" Blue giggled..
*BEEP*
Thank god for the bell!

~End of chapter 1~


Last edited by Beauty26 on Sun May 09, 2010 5:45 pm; edited 11 times in total
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pinkys
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pinkys


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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeMon Feb 22, 2010 7:26 pm

good beginning! can't wait for more!!
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kiki424
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kiki424


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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeMon Feb 22, 2010 7:33 pm

nice beginning it actually grabbed my attention i wanna hear more!
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Lyli
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Lyli


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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeMon Feb 22, 2010 7:50 pm

I edited the story! Now there's more! (: Enjoy.
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Sharpsul999
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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeMon Feb 22, 2010 8:27 pm

Beauty, you copyed too much from my story.

1. You centered it.

2. You added an introduction

3. The pics.

I mean, c'mon :/.

otherwise, its an ok story. Needs a little more detail though.
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Lyli
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Lyli


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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeTue Feb 23, 2010 5:38 am

sharpsul99 wrote:
Beauty, you copyed too much from my story.

1. You centered it.

2. You added an introduction

3. The pics.

I mean, c'mon :/.

otherwise, its an ok story. Needs a little more detail though.

I am NOT copying you...

1. It would look bad if I didn't center it.

2. Every single story in the world has a introduction.

3. The pic is for when someone reads my stroy, they can actually see what the character looks like.

So, I just proved you, Sharp, that I am not "copying" you.
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Candy456
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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeTue Feb 23, 2010 5:41 am

I think it's a pretty good story, but it doesn't really have that excitement/suspense feeling. Sorry. :/
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Lyli
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Lyli


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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeTue Feb 23, 2010 5:45 am

Candy456 wrote:
I think it's a pretty good story, but it doesn't really have that excitement/suspense feeling. Sorry. :/

This story isn't supposed to be like Sharp's story, Suspenceful and "exciting"

Sorry to dissapoint you. -.-
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McKenna
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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeTue Feb 23, 2010 1:08 pm

Great story! Can't wait for more!
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Lyli
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Lyli


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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeTue Feb 23, 2010 1:49 pm

Chapter 1 is completely finished! Smile
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Candy456
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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeTue Feb 23, 2010 2:42 pm

Beauty26 wrote:
Candy456 wrote:
I think it's a pretty good story, but it doesn't really have that excitement/suspense feeling. Sorry. :/

This story isn't supposed to be like Sharp's story, Suspenceful and "exciting"

Sorry to dissapoint you. -.-

I never reffered to sharp's story, did i? >> its just that, well, nevermind. Anyways, I also said I though it was a good story! don't focus on negative stuf!
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Trash
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Trash


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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeTue Feb 23, 2010 2:59 pm

Great. I think you stalked me, because this happens to me EVERY day.
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Sharpsul999
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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeTue Feb 23, 2010 3:25 pm

Beauty26 wrote:
sharpsul99 wrote:
Beauty, you copyed too much from my story.

1. You centered it.

2. You added an introduction

3. The pics.

I mean, c'mon :/.

otherwise, its an ok story. Needs a little more detail though.

I am NOT copying you...

1. It would look bad if I didn't center it.

2. Every single story in the world has a introduction.

3. The pic is for when someone reads my stroy, they can actually see what the character looks like.

So, I just proved you, Sharp, that I am not "copying" you.

1. It looks fine if you center.

2. not everyone on here has introed stories

3. maybe instead of pics, you could DRAW them, since this barely is fantage themed.

Sorry, but Im not letting you bump past my story since your copying me :/.
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Trash
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Trash


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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeTue Feb 23, 2010 3:54 pm

sharpsul99 wrote:
Beauty26 wrote:
sharpsul99 wrote:
Beauty, you copyed too much from my story.

1. You centered it.

2. You added an introduction

3. The pics.

I mean, c'mon :/.

otherwise, its an ok story. Needs a little more detail though.

I am NOT copying you...

1. It would look bad if I didn't center it.

2. Every single story in the world has a introduction.

3. The pic is for when someone reads my stroy, they can actually see what the character looks like.

So, I just proved you, Sharp, that I am not "copying" you.

1. It looks fine if you center.

2. not everyone on here has introed stories

3. maybe instead of pics, you could DRAW them, since this barely is fantage themed.

Sorry, but Im not letting you bump past my story since your copying me :/.

Sharp, shes not copying you.
Its like if I wrote a book and someone else used an introduction, pictures of the same thing, etc.

And, your stories are each 99.99% Different from each other!
Don't start with it sharp, please. Just keep calm. I introduce my stories, I center, AND I PUT PICS.of.same.stuff. kthnx
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Lyli
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Lyli


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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeTue Feb 23, 2010 4:59 pm

I'm making chapter 2! Woot! (;
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McKenna
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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeTue Feb 23, 2010 5:01 pm

Beauty26 wrote:
I'm making chapter 2! Woot! (;

Awesome! Can't wait for it!
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CakeBossLover
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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeTue Feb 23, 2010 5:06 pm

I Cant Wait
Till Chapter Two! This one was awesome!
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http://nicki445fantage.forummotion.com/forum.htm
Sakura
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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeTue Feb 23, 2010 5:30 pm

that was so cute!
I love it!!!
I favorite thing would be the title.
It's awesome!!!

But I would add in a lil more vocab, the words you use are a little plain.
(LOL sorry habit) D:
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Lyli
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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeTue Feb 23, 2010 7:41 pm

Sakura wrote:
that was so cute!
I love it!!!
I favorite thing would be the title.
It's awesome!!!

But I would add in a lil more vocab, the words you use are a little plain.
(LOL sorry habit) D:

Thanks, Grace xD It's my first story, but I'll keep editing it (:
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Jenette
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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeTue Feb 23, 2010 11:13 pm

Awesome chapter : )
Kinda remind me of someone ;]
& i can't wait for the 2nd chap.!
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Lyli
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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeThu Feb 25, 2010 9:53 am

~Chapter 2~

I unlocked the door throwing all my provisions on the floor.
"If it's you an me forever, if it's you and me right now.."
the sound of Nick's voice was uplifting
I got a text for Blue saying,

I no u like max (;

I laughed at the text, because it was so true. But I had to deny.
So I replied,

Haha no I dn

I stopped texting for a moment...
Was I really gonna lie to Blue?
I deleted the text...and decided to just ignore it.
I ran up the stairs to my haven, my bedroom.
It was a place where I could just run away from life, and it won't ever find me.
I went to my iHome and blasted the music to MAX
"Max..." I whispered under my breath.

My cell phone sang again, and this time it was a text from Straw...

Blue told me tht u <3 max..tht tru?

I didn't know what to do, lie, get called a backstabber by my friends, tell the truth, they tell max I "Loveeeeeee" him.

So I replied to straw, with my hand violently shaking.

I dnt really want to tell u ova txting...@ HR I will ;P

The sound of my cell phone gave me a mini heart attack,

O.K? why cnt u just tell meh?

My heart raced faster.

I dnt think i can txt ova a bill words, straw (;

And she replied instanty, without hesitating.

O.K finerz, you win xD see ya 2moro gurllll! <3 chu!

I gave out a short laugh, which was a sign of relif.
I shut my phone off, blasted the music higher, and dosed off....

~End of Chapter 2~
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McKenna
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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeThu Feb 25, 2010 2:04 pm

Awesome! I like deh part with Straw in it xD

but great! 10/10
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Lyli
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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeThu Feb 25, 2010 2:17 pm

Thanks, straw! I'm going to make chapter 3 soon!

Also, Mace, Can you move this out of Fantage Creations, because this isn't really "Fantage Themed"...Thanks...
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snake
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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeThu Feb 25, 2010 2:20 pm

Great job! [:
I have a single question...
Why did it go from "Ash" to "Blue"? o.o
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Lyli
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PostSubject: Re: ~Blindfold -a Love story~   ~Blindfold -a Love story~ Icon_minitimeThu Feb 25, 2010 2:25 pm

Zezori wrote:
Great job! [:
I have a single question...
Why did it go from "Ash" to "Blue"? o.o

In the second chapter, I'm home..and Blue is the one who thinks I like max...So that's why she texted me. Yupperz xD

P.S My three friends in the story are Blue, Ash, and Straw.
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