| | 3 minutes-a story | |
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+4sahilin Magdaleena Nessy ashley123 8 posters |
Should the story be a series or short stories? | Series | | 75% | [ 6 ] | Short story | | 25% | [ 2 ] |
| Total Votes : 8 | | Poll closed |
| Author | Message |
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ashley123 Loyal Fantagian
Posts : 1934 Join date : 2010-01-27 Age : 111
| Subject: 3 minutes-a story Sat Jan 01, 2011 11:09 am | |
| Hey guys.. I know my first story i made was terrible, and plus i did it because i was bored? But this story is because i'm passionate about writing it. This is a one page story, it's not in chapters though. - Spoiler:
Dear Cassie,
The doctors just told me that they are taking off your life support monitor in 3 minutes. I know I'm the last person to accept the fact that our Cassie is dying from cancer, but this can't be real. It just can’t. I wish, as your younger sister, that I could have detected the cancer in your body, alerted the doctors ahead of time so that there could’ve been a way to save you; make it possible to fast forward through all your pain. You look so small and fragile, lying so still on those snowy white sheets. All those similar features that we shared on our face, that made us look so alike, are now lost. Your beautiful chocolaty brown curls, the ones any girl would die to have, are missing too. But, as I’m sitting here in the deserted ER hallway, all I can think of is the memories that you and I shared.
I remember the rare occasions when you and I got along. We were so mischievous. The times when we let all the balloons go out the window during Rachel’s 8th birthday party or scaring Matthew so bad when we blew the noise makers directly into his face, that he had to change his pants because he did you know what in them. Or that time when you snuck in the puppy at night and attempted to hide it under my bed so mom and dad wouldn’t see. But seconds late, it took a dump on the carpet. We were so grossed out but had to keep silent. How long did it take us to clean everything up? 3 hours.
Cassie, you’ve been my role model for as long as I can remember. You still are. I've always looked up to you, copying thing you did, things you ate, and sometimes the way you dressed. I know I annoyed you half the time. I mean, I don’t blame you now that I look back. But now that I see you barely alive and happy, I appreciate the wonderful things you did. You taught me to become who I am today. You experienced highschool before me, and told me numerous things about it and who to avoid. Without you, I’d probably still be roaming around the halls like a lost puppy looking for its owner.
Likewise, you explained things so much better than anyone else. Like the time when we were eating oranges and I accidentally swallowed the seed. You explained to me that oranges won't grow in my stomach, even though I was convinced it would. It took awhile, but I soon believed you. You were like my personal encyclopedia. I just can't bear to see you go so soon.
As I saw the ER light shut off I knew that the three minutes were now up. As much as I'm sad to see you go, I'm also proud.
Well I hope you guys liked my story! If you want me to post more, i have a bunch in my head.
Last edited by ashley123 on Sat Jan 01, 2011 11:18 am; edited 1 time in total | |
| | | Nessy Passionate Fantagian
Posts : 915 Join date : 2010-08-26 Age : 25 Location : My happy place
| Subject: Re: 3 minutes-a story Sat Jan 01, 2011 11:15 am | |
| Aww! That was really good! Is this going to be a series of short stories? | |
| | | ashley123 Loyal Fantagian
Posts : 1934 Join date : 2010-01-27 Age : 111
| Subject: Re: 3 minutes-a story Sat Jan 01, 2011 11:16 am | |
| - Nessy wrote:
- Aww! That was really good! Is this going to be a series of short stories?
Thanks! I'm acually not sure.. should it be a series? I'll make a vote. | |
| | | Magdaleena Expert Fantagian
Posts : 2261 Join date : 2010-04-26 Age : 27 Location : Somewhere in northern Europe. Probably hours ahead of you.
| Subject: Re: 3 minutes-a story Sat Jan 01, 2011 12:48 pm | |
| Cassie? Rachel? Call me weird, but the first thing I think about when I hear/see those names are the Animorphs called Cassie and Rachel. But the appearance you described is totally different from Cassie the animorph, as she's black and has no sense for fashion. Probably just a naming coincidence... Anyways, your short story was pretty well written so far. Way to go. But what's an ER? | |
| | | sahilin Senior Fantagian
Posts : 356 Join date : 2010-11-01 Location : Good Question.
| Subject: Re: 3 minutes-a story Sat Jan 01, 2011 1:05 pm | |
| Awwwww how sad and sweet! I was playing a sad song when I was reading this so it made it even sadder and sweeter. | |
| | | pat Veteran Fantagian
Posts : 4245 Join date : 2010-12-29 Age : 22 Location : USA
| Subject: Re: 3 minutes-a story Sat Jan 01, 2011 1:19 pm | |
| i think you should do a series | |
| | | ashley123 Loyal Fantagian
Posts : 1934 Join date : 2010-01-27 Age : 111
| Subject: Re: 3 minutes-a story Sat Jan 01, 2011 8:59 pm | |
| - Magdaleena wrote:
- Cassie? Rachel? Call me weird, but the first thing I think about when I hear/see those names are the Animorphs called Cassie and Rachel.
But the appearance you described is totally different from Cassie the animorph, as she's black and has no sense for fashion. Probably just a naming coincidence...
Anyways, your short story was pretty well written so far. Way to go. But what's an ER? Uhh acually i just thought of those names.. i didn't really care what the name means. And ER means emercency room. And! Thanks | |
| | | bladerunner22 Devoted Fantagian
Posts : 530 Join date : 2010-11-27 Age : 24 Location : Asia
| Subject: Re: 3 minutes-a story Sun Jan 02, 2011 5:33 am | |
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| | | Trash Loyal Fantagian
Posts : 1685 Join date : 2010-01-31 Age : 25
| Subject: Re: 3 minutes-a story Sun Jan 02, 2011 7:58 am | |
| Don't do a series. You won't finish it. And I really liked this, JUST as a short story. | |
| | | pat Veteran Fantagian
Posts : 4245 Join date : 2010-12-29 Age : 22 Location : USA
| Subject: Re: 3 minutes-a story Sun Jan 02, 2011 8:10 am | |
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| | | ashley123 Loyal Fantagian
Posts : 1934 Join date : 2010-01-27 Age : 111
| Subject: Re: 3 minutes-a story Sun Jan 02, 2011 11:26 am | |
| Thanks! Omg i don't know what to do!! I'm going to wait 1 more day and see if i should do a series or not. | |
| | | Relora Hero Fantagian
Posts : 6776 Join date : 2010-11-30 Age : 26 Location : Define "Location"
| Subject: Re: 3 minutes-a story Wed Jan 12, 2011 4:11 pm | |
| its a very good story and made me feel like crying | |
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